laughcentre:

don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes

(Source: allantruong, via twerkerus)


354,369 notes




assume:

deair:

so one time i was at the mall and then out of nowhere this guy put his arm around me and said hey but then i got really scared and so i screamed bYE AND WHILE I SPRINTED AWAY HE RAN AFTER ME AND YELLED WAIT COME BACK AND TO THIS DAY I DONT KNOW WHY THIS HAPPENED

fuck that was me 

(via twerkerus)


45,736 notes




gnawruto:

foodtrucker:

I manage to turn everything into crap wow

yes that’s called digestion

(Source: foodtrucker, via perks-of-being-chinese)


263,184 notes


taliabobalia:

jusky:


We will rock you!

This made me hear something with my eyes instead of my ears.

that’s the power of queen, my friend.
heterosaxual:

when you thought he couldnt get more annoying


eridantherudefish:

oboebandgeek99:

heckacute:

If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

Why the fuck would I do that

its a metaphor you see

(via pastafaqioli)


218,008 notes




justbeingfabulous:

you know those people that can literally carry on a conversation with anyone are amazing like wow how do you do that

(Source: kjxq, via perks-of-being-chinese)


448,862 notes


lipstucks:

let’s be friends ok pls 


hellanerd:

at school like

image

(via pizza)


84,617 notes